Have you ever seen someone in love? People in love are ridiculous! They are fun to watch, but you have to admit, they are terrible to work with. Most of the time they are so preoccupied with their beloved that it is almost impossible for them to focus. They are always in a daze. And people in love cannot help but share it. Well, I was now crazy in love with Jesus, and I wanted everyone to know I became totally obsessed with telling the other soldiers about Him. Sometime I would go down the hallway in the barracks and knock on every door. I would even sit patiently at the latrine and wait until a soldier sat down inside. Then I would think, "I've got at least thirty seconds to talk to her through the stall door. I was all zeal and no wisdom, cramming Jesus down everyone's throats. Some were turned off, but several received the Lord. Before long, Carson and I were leading a small group of soldiers into something of a mini-revival on post. The chaplain gave us a key to come to the chapel any time we wanted, and every day, as soon as we finished our duties, we were there... sometimes all night long. I still have a photograph that shows a sea of our Army boot toes and our hands in the air, as all of us lay on our backs on the chapel floor and worshiped the Lord.
After a while, this newborn passion began to interrupt our training. We became preoccupied with loving each other and lost our military focus. Our superiors began to break up our group and scatter us around. Carson, a now dear friend, ended up losing her position in military intelligence. Fortunately, she was reassigned as a chaplain's assistant, which was ideal for her. I was even more disruptive than she was, so they actually pulled me in and send me to a psychiatrist. I guess my continual tears of joy and incessant witnessing looked a little unbalanced. However, nothing else mattered - all I cared about was leading people to Christ. I led my lieutenant, a woman who was supposed to discipline me, to the Lord, and she ended up joining the chapel choir, Then our commander received Jesus! I was so in love I even tried to get the psychiatrist saved! Unfortunately, that did not go over too well.
Eventually, my base had seen enough of me and my love drunk behavior. Initially, the Army sent me to another post three thousand miles away. It did not matter to me, it was just another place where people needed Jesus. Before long, however my new commander called me in and threatened to send me to the brig if I did not shape up and get in line. That shocked me, because I still loved the military, the soldiers and what I was doing. I had even received my appointment to West Point, and I thought I was on track with my military career. But soon after that confrontation, I received word that West Point had withdrawn my appointment because my behavior looked too extreme. I was crushed. I had climbed so high, only to fall so far.
Finally, I was called in and offered honorable discharge. Initially I did not accept it, but two weeks later they called me back and said, "That's not an option." Taking the hint this time, I accepted and got ready to move on to something new. Looking back now, I know I could have gotten a Section 8 discharge for the mentally unfit. But my performance remained strong overall, and I was not being malicious or divisive. I was just in love. How do you put a lid on that?
EXCERPT from Outrageous Courage
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